I’ll address all my issues with this article (and there are many) in later blog posts. Today, I just want to focus on the label and why I think it is important. So, I’ve written you a letter. If you are a woman and a Christian and struggle with the label of feminism then this is for you. If you are an atheist dude who has feminist tattooed on your butt you can keep reading too. You might learn something.
I’m a feminist. Which means that I respect and support your decision to identify as a feminist or not. Choice. That’s the thing. I believe, fundamentally, that you have a right to stay home with your kids. You have the right take your husband’s last name. You have the right to have a baby in the first year of your marriage. You have the right to reject feminism. If you want to. I’m a feminist. So I think you, as a woman, can do whatever exists in the realm of the possible and maybe even a little more. And I think I can convince you to come over to the dark side. Read on, sister.
I think the Church’s major issue is the company we feminists keep. We are largely democratic, liberal, promiscuous, sex-positive women. We are lesbians and single mothers. Women living in sin and baring our breasts at Pussy Riot concerts. Tattooed and pierced and short-haired. But, that is not all feminists. I am a feminist. I’m also a virgin, a Christian, and a very modest dresser.
I get it. You look at feminism and you don’t see yourself. But if you want a feminism of stay at home mothers and cardigan clad Sunday school teachers then you must make it so. You must stand up and be counted among us. Only then will we truly see a revolution. Please do not look at the landscape of feminism and reject it simply because some of us aren’t you. You may not see yourself, but I see you.
Here’s a secret. I used to not want to be labelled a Christian. In fact, the label still makes me kind of uncomfortable. I didn’t (and don’t) want to be associated with all the Church does. But, I realized that if I didn’t stand up and reclaim that label for myself it would be lost entirely to a group of people that I didn’t care for. If I didn’t call myself a Christian then I was letting them win. I was letting fundamentalist, misogynistic, racist people take on the title that was won for me on the cross. And they can’t have it.
So, women of the Church, we have to take it on ourselves. It is our job to make feminism more inclusive. The only way to do that is to be included. Yes, some of us are lesbians, some of us voted for President Obama, and some of us have sex with people that we have no intention of marrying. But, not all of us. If you believe in equality (and you say that you do!), if you really truly believe that you are equal to the men around you then please join us. We want you.
Maybe you think you don’t need feminism because you are happy and independent and loving life. That is awesome. Rock on. But, as my little sister once said, “I’m not just a feminist for myself, I’m a feminist for all women”. I have to get harsh here for a second. Ladies, I believe that you are unintentionally contributing to a patriarchal system that abuses and mistreats women all around the world. Maybe living in the West, you don’t see the point. But, we aren’t just talking about you. We are talking about 10 year old girls married to men four times their age and raped the day they have their first period (if not before). We are talking about women who are mutilated so that they will not be tempted to engage in sex outside marriage. We are talking about women who are sold into slavery and raped and abused their entire lives. I believe that the systematic mistreatment of women is a result of rampant and unchecked sexism. We are not just talking about catcalls and dirty jokes. This is for real. This is big. If women everywhere can stand up and say we matter. Then women everywhere can start to matter. Feminism is about dignity, respect, and equality everywhere. For men and for women. It is not your fault that women are abused and mistreated, but you can do something about it. I genuinely believe that an inclusive feminist movement can change the world. We can change attitudes and actions in our generation and the generations to come. We can change what feminism looks like. But if you just go on saying you believe in “equality” but refusing to count yourself as one of us then we will only ever be half of what we could be.
This is my last plea. There is no initiation. No bra burning or ritual reading of Gloria Steinem. You just take the label for yourself. You let it mean what it means to you. You shape it to do your will. When someone asks if you call yourself a feminist, you just smile quietly and say yes. And when you do the earth will shake just a little, people will gasp in shock, and women everywhere will be grateful for your bravery. I am grateful to share at least one label with you. I am proud to stand with you under the banner of Christ. So, I hope you will join me under this banner of mine, there's plenty of room and I'd love some company.
Go in peace to love and serve the Lord.
Sara